Split The Lit Prize

I was always under the impression that the Nobels were given for furthering the cause of the field they were awarded in. And of course, Nobel literature prize winners inspire noble feelings in our hearts and open our eyes, and for that they must be lauded. But they don't inspire us to write anything. On the contrary, after reading, say, Yeats's poems or Solzhenitsyn's novels (One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich is a terrifying masterpiece), one feels that attempting to write would be useless; after all, one will never match the beauty of these writers' works.

Maybe we should split the literature prize in two. One should be given to great authors whose work enriches humanity at large. But the other should be given to crap authors - authors who somehow managed to get published and popular despite writing truly awful garbage. These, these are the authors who really inspire you to write, the ones who make you say, "Fuck it, even I can do better than this." 

If the Nobel is too precious to be sullied by associating it with these tree-wasters, I suggest we name the prize after the Mills and Boon publishing house.