Indian In Da House !

Hello the ladies and the gentlemen, and welcome to great Indian hypnotist magician's show... on hypnosis. Sorry, too many "hypnosis" like words there, haha... So yes, people, welcome, I am the "Indian In Da House!"... ... ... "Indian In Da House!", the ladies and the gents... oh you heard me, OK fine, I only thought because you did not laugh that you did not notice the way I said the "Da". I mean, when the black comedy persons say something like that, the people, you know, they whistle and clap like crazy. No I am not being like rascist, I was only trying to crack a joke,... no, no, sir, please calm yourself, I was trying to... OK I will get on with it. So yes, the ladies and the gents, please prepare yourself to be astonished like hell! And don't call me Michael Richards, I am not a bloody white bastard....







... and, of course, I am not rascist also.







OK then, let us move on! Now, for my first trick I would like to call for the volunteer from the crowd. You over there,.. no not you, that one, no, no, I mean you, the pretty young virgin one with the nice cleavage... No I am not being rude madam, your daughter is very pretty and I am telling it like it is only. What you mean, I have no business saying that, you mean your daughter has bad cleavage, or what !?! Or maybe you mean that she is not a virgin, hahaha,... come on people, it is only a joke, if black guy says it like that you,... OK sorry , sorry, my bad. So that young lady does not want to be volunteer then. OK, but she is missing something, I am telling you right now. No sir, no refunds, sorry,.. yes madam, that is the policy, if you want your money's worth you have to watch the show... hey maybe you can be volunteer... you will !?! Nice, nice.







OK the ladies and the gentlemens, "Indian In Da House!" will amaze you with awesome trick! Sit here madam, yes like that, and close your eyes. Now, I am going to relax your body bit by bit. Most people, they have lots of the tension in the neck. I relax your neck now, OK!?! (Reaches out with both hands and twists her neck, ninja style.) OK, now, as you can see, she is totally relaxed. Her body is completely at ease. Calm... cool... see, totally relaxed. No, no sir, you are not supposed to come onto the stage, no no, you will ... No sir, do not touch her, I have hypnotised her, she is... No no sir, please, she is not dead, only relaxed, no sir... of course she is not breathing, I tell you she is relaxed, relaxed persons, they do not breathe, I tell you, I know, I have done this show in India hundreds of times. Look sir, there is no need to call police, look I will make you deal, I will give you refund,... there you go, see, no need to call police, no sir do not call police,... if the black person had done like this you would have... Ouch!







Yes officer, I will not lie to you, I will tell it like it is only. I tell you she is not really dead. I could have woken her up, yes sir, easily, but her bastard husband came on the stage and disturbed me. Then she fell into very deep trance, now she can only wake up when trance releases her. I know the body is cold, that is what the very relaxed persons, their body is like that only. Some of the volunteers in India, they have even started to rot, but the trance it is very powerful, they do not wake up easily.







You see Mr. Lawyer, they do not believe me. You believe me right !?! You say, jury will not accept my statement,... it is because I am not from USA, right !?! You have way out !?! Thank you so much! OK, OK, sorry, ... no I did not mean it in a gay way, I only did it to show how much ... OK,... fine. So the deal is... OK OK, I will plead insanity plea... what condition !?! OK, sure I will hypnotise his wife as birthday gift. For discount, no wait, for free. Of course I do not sound like surprised. The Indian judges, they all make same deal with me. All of them are very satisfied. I tell you he has made very good deal. I am professional. I tell you, I have done this hundreds of times...